This is the post excerpt.
First and foremost, thank you for visiting my Blog. Allow me to give you a quick rundown of me in a nutshell. My name is Kerry and I am a 45-year-old Christian and mother of six. I have been married twice and divorced once. If I had to choose the biggest blessing of my life I would surely say with 100% sincerity that it is my husband Clayton. I prayed fervently for him and God answered my prayer.
My children’s ages range from 4 to 28 (five boys and one girl). For everyday conversation I like to divide them into two categories for clarity … “My first batch and my second batch”.
My first batch of four are grown adults now, and among them they have provided me with five beautiful granddaughters. My second batch are ages 6 and 4, they are very handsome little men that do a fantastic job at making sure I never have enough time to become too self-absorbed. At this point you might be saying ‘Wow , she must be crazy to have started all over again!’ , and if that is the case my reply to you would be, a resounding “Yes ! Yes! I am!” I would also say that God has an amazing sense of humor.
In viewing my blog it is important to know that I am a poet and didn’t even know it. Well at least until I gave my heart or what I like to say “The heart of my matters” to God in 1992. Along my journey I have grown, failed, pondered, and fought like most who seek God’s ways and I still continue to do all these things. However, it is there in the midst of all of it that God led me to write, and in that writing God has taught me a multitude of things that result in the working out of my faith.
It is true that God our creator has made us all unique, special, and different and that we are all walking our own path and purpose. Yet it is my hope and prayer that my path might touch yours in some way; in the way that only God can arrange.
Therefore, I must tell you that I am so glad you are here and I am looking forward to sharing my thoughts and poetry with you and I humbly pray that you are blessed.
I wanted to tell someone….
but I didn’t think they would hear me
so I let it spoil in my throat like sour milk.
I wanted to cry on someones shoulder
but they kept shrugging … so I fell off.
Pain can only be licked sufficiently;
by the one whom endures the wound.
Yet people say they can cure me
as they drop crumbs from up on a roof.
Despair is real
and You are not here…
if You are then make it known
I know You have set my pardon
but the wind… seems my chastened home.
I might care…
But, I WANT it straight !
I hate the game….
I HATE THE GAME !
Candy is not sweet …?
but I am not a fool…
even the white ones are impure
and “feelings” … are not the given rule !
Technicalities ? or self intention ?
Sacrifice ? or a loving deed ?
Is it to salvage clout ? or conscience ?
Is it the truth ? I beg ! I plead !
If not ..Dont keep it to yourself..
Use respect with kindly truth.
because honesty births dignity
Even if … they’ll all hate you.
Discernment sees behind a joust
and may cause to swallow hard
but hope is that you are true to you.
Then we both can know where we start.
Yes; maybe we wont be the same…
But there is nothing more I HATE…
Than Black Kettles whitened by bluffs
and kind answers that only play games!
When whispers seek a place to rent
and insecurity is on the find
Be sure to bruise both of your knees
and post No vacancy’s in your mind.
Satan owns this world
and evil rules each day.
and no matter how you cut it
when you look around…
Because logic cannot scream more
Its all up and in your face
that we walk upon a taken land…
and can only call upon His grace
The suffering goes on and on
and good cards they lose when played
But God has raised up His own standard
and we must look to the one who saves.
If heart and home seek perpetual peace
Do not be a fool or Idealist
because His brides true home
is NOT this LOT
and only eternity will deal it.
99 years are worth a penny
and Satan fights little against the lost
be careful what you give for ante
because this world is not worth the cost.
Maybe I needed to learn how to fight
Or maybe I needed to learn how to trust.
Maybe it had nothing to do with me
or maybe it did.
Maybe it was an assignment for another
and maybe they needed it most.
Maybe I thought I had nothing to offer
and I couldn’t see past my own nose.
Maybe I needed to be patient
or maybe I needed to charge.
but maybe You had many plans
and maybe I had none.
Maybe I dont know what I’m doing
But maybe You do.
I’m Just a girl
I’m just a mother
Give them strength when they need it most
and even before that.
I have tried to stop the rain
But You work within our pain
Teach them like I couldnt
and fill my many holes
I call those voids my failures
But I know that its You…
that will guard their souls.
I don’t know what You’re doing
but You know everywhere I’ve been
I cannot hear sharply what you are saying
But you know every word I’ve said
You’re word it is sufficient
Infallible to any test
But I cant see you here in front of me
and You don”t speak like all the rest
Infallable to any test
Will my talent be enough
Should I begin to dig a hole
Or set up Your account
and hope fear will not outrun me
Can my rhymes pick up the tab
on an investment You have given
Is it a gift with too high a task
Or a Joy to act and use it.
With doubt I cast my net
Beside a coin You will call back
In the hopes for a return
In the hopes to give You plenty
Weigh me like Ezekiel
Let obedience be Your measure
If this talent does not glean
Allow my effort to be Your treasure.
Venus is never out of reach
and balloons are the job of a prophet
A good mans garden has weeds
and the stairway to heaven is spotless
White robes are only given
and tickets to paradise are paid in blood
A good man hopes to achieve
but a sinner seeks his Master.
and people go
Yet I am all alone.
and people speak
yet I am all alone
A flight of excitement
A word deeply heard
To ponder in desperation.
A need to give
a gift to take
Yet I am all alone.
Alone in birth
Alone in death
Even a twin
Alone with few
Alone with many
Yet not alone in You.
Stick closer Lord
much closer Lord
than any human brother.
Alone is found in all
But You are like no other.